You’ve really dropped the ball again.
You’re behind on that super important work project, you forgot your best friend’s birthday, and you’re feeling the worst about the hurtful things you said to your boyfriend in the middle of that nasty argument last night.
You know what you need to do.
Saying you’re sorry is the most common way to express regret for a mistake you’ve made and communicate kindness toward whomever may have been hurt in the process.
It shows others that you want to right your wrong.
And that’s what you’re going for. You feel horrible about what you’ve done and you hate that you’ve hurt people you care about.
When you apologize from a place a sincerity and openness, wounds are mended and broken hearts are healed.
However, there are certain things that you don’t need apologize for. Ever.
12 Things You Should Never Apologize For:
1. Trying something new
When you begin trying new things, people close to you may become uncomfortable or concerned. Wearing a leather jacket? Rock climbing? That is so not you! But the thing about new experiences is that they allow you grow and peel back the layers to reveal the most authentic version of you, so I say, own them with all you’ve got!
2. Telling the truth
It is important to be honest and truthful in a kind way, however, there is no need to feel guilty or apologize for telling someone how you feel. It takes courage and strength to take down those barriers and share the truth in some situations.
3. Saying no
We often play nice and hide our true feelings because we don’t want to be perceived as a jerk. We feel like we have to please everyone and saying “yes” is usually much easier than saying “no”. But it’s okay to stand your ground and say no when you’re completely swamped and don’t have time or aren’t just aren’t interested.
4. Wanting to be alone
As an introvert, I need more alone time than most people, so over the years, I’ve had to learn to stop apologizing for it. I mean, why should I have to apologize for who I am and what makes me happy? We all need personal space.
5. Ordering dessert
So many women apologize for ordering dessert, as if it’s a huge mistake or faux pas. You’re a grown women, you’re allowed to eat whatever you want. When you apologize for it, what’s actually happening is that you’re trying to find a way to make yourself feel less guilty. And if you’re feeling guilty about dessert, there’s something else much deeper going on that one little apology is not going to fix (but a dose of self-love might…).
6. Putting yourself first
The most rewarding thing to do is to prioritize what’s important to you. It’s the first step toward that self-love piece we just talked about. I know it can seem selfish, but when you feel fulfilled, you’re in such a better place to give back to others. You don’t need to apologize for wanting the very best for yourself, because you are worth it.
7. Asking for what you need
If you don’t ask, the answer will always be no. A little help fixing dinner? A ride to work because your car is in the shop? A judgment-free vent session? You know what you need, and asking for it will only make your life easier. Don’t be so hard on yourself.
8. Someone else’s bad day
You just left an amazing yoga class, your bills are paid, and you’re still on a high after getting a raise at work last week. Your life is awesome! But your friend isn’t so lucky. You meet for coffee and she spends the entire hour complaining about her crazy day at work. Of course you don’t like seeing her in this bad mood, but apologizing for her bad day isn’t going to fix it. Instead, let her know that you’re here if she wants to talk.
9. Passionately going after what you want
I believe the point of life is to be happy. Simple as that. And the best way to make that happen is to find what lights you up and fill your life with those things. Apologizing for going after your passions discredits their value and is totally unnecessary.
10. Changing your mind
You’re not a robot and you’re allowed to have thoughts and feelings. You’re allowed to change your mind if you decide that situation no longer serves your or lines up with your personal values.
11. Staying in bed all day
Obviously this is not something you want to do every day, but spending a Saturday lounging in bed with a good book or a marathon of Pretty Little Liars is an indulgence you deserve once in a while. Treat yourself!
12. Being happy
If being happy is the point of life, you should never have to apologize for it. When you’re happy, you’re living your life’s purpose, you’re connecting to your higher power, and you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. And there’s nothing better than that.
What do you need to stop apologizing for?
[photo credit: shironekoeuro]