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You Are In Charge of Your Own Happiness

by Ashley on April 18, 2012 · 0 comments

Last weekend I was puppy-sitting for my sister while she was out of town. Her little chihuahua/daschund mix, Louis, and I usually get along pretty well, but he must have been feeling extra feisty because things did not go so well this time! He ran out into the street when I let him outside, he sat by the window and barked at the neighbors for hours, and he kept eating off my plate during dinner!

I was becoming more and more angry as the day went on.

I thought to myself, “If he would just stop barking and start behaving, then I would be happy!”

But then I realized something.

We can’t control other people. (Or dogs.)

We are only in charge of how we feel.

We can’t rely on others to make us happy, but we can create our own happiness.

Maybe you’re thinking, “I always focus on my own happiness! That’s why I beg my mom to take me to the mall, I try to date the cutest boys, and I constantly e-mail Justin Bieber- I know we’re meant to be together!”

But really, if you look a little closer, you’ll see that you’re still asking things from people, and you can’t control what they decide to do.

I want wishing and praying that the puppy would behaving and telling myself that I would only be happy if he behaved. But really, he decides how he feels and what he does, and I can’t control that.

So, the trick is to understand and admit that you are powerless over other people (or in my case, a dog). I know it’s hard and it’s definitely not fun, but it is how you can be truly happy.

If you can let your guard down and admit that you can’t control other people, then you become free to create your own happiness.

You can start trying new things and building new relationships. You can experiment with different situations to see which ones feel better- more natural- than the hopeless feeling of trying to change someone.

For example, you can try thinking, “I really wish my mom would take me to the mall, but I can’t control her decisions. I can only control how I react. I will ask her, but if she says no today, I will ask her when she might be able to take me. Then, I will find something else to do and not let this ruin my mood.”

In a way, you’re actually taking back your power. Instead of giving it away to other people, you are taking charge of your happiness.

And that’s the first step toward living your super awesome life.

How are you taking charge of your happiness?

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